Sorry, My Wife Has a Hole in Her Brain Chapter 16

No matter what kind of banquet it was, Su Wenqing's favorite part was eating, because eating not only allows her to remain clear-headed but also eases the silent awkwardness due to lack of ability to continue the conversation.

Jin Wangfei held the banquet in the peach forest. The dishes on the table were exquisite and unique. The pink and white flower petals danced in the wind and fell into the wine jar. The clear aroma of wine mixed with the fragrance of peach blossoms, created extreme elegance.

After three rounds of drinks, Jin Wang invited all the young masters and young ladies to the mountain stream beside the peach forest.

Su Wenqing was still distracted, reminiscing about the crystal peach blossom jelly that she had not finished eating just now. When she came back to her senses, she saw that everyone had already sat down on the ground on both sides of the stream in tacit understanding.

Su Wenqing hurriedly grabbed Su Zhining who was walking backwards stealthily and asked in a low voice: "What's going on? What are we doing?"

Su Zhining anxiously tried to pull her sleeve out of Su Wenqing's hand, but after trying a few times to no avail, she had to settle for the next best thing and use Su Wenqing to block Wang Xiuyan's sight.

"Flower Lanterns!! Have you never played them? Do you see those peach blossom lanterns at the uppermost part of the river? Each lantern holds a cup of wine, and there are words engraved under the cup. Later, they will place these lanterns into the stream one by one, and they will float downstream. Whoever the lantern stops beside will get to recite a poem, draw a picture, or play a musical instrument based on the words under the cup."

Su Wenqing: ??? No one told her that the Spring Banquet was so dangerous!! What should she do as an outsider who knows nothing about music, chess, calligraphy and painting??

Su Zhining said, "I won't talk to you anymore. I'm going to find a seat in the back or Brother Xiuyan will notice me."

Su Wenqing grabbed Su Zhining who was about to leave and asked, "What's the difference between sitting at the front and at the back?"

Su Zhining spoke quickly, "In order to make the lanterns stop, they chose shallow streams. Generally, the lanterns will stop in the front, and there is only a very small chance that they will float to the back."

"Let's go, let's go," Su Wenqing immediately took Su Zhining's arm, "I'll go to the back with you."

Su Zhining asked suspiciously as they walked, "What's wrong with you today? Don't you usually love this kind of activity? Based on your usual personality, you should have found a place where the lanterns were most likely to stop."

Su Wenqing pretended to laugh and pointed to the last seat and said, "There are two seats left at the back. Should we go there?"

Su Zhining said, "Your intention is too obvious. The Su family is one of the five great families after all. If you sit there without getting a turn the whole time, you will be urged by everyone to come out and perform in the end."

"Over there, over there," Su Zhining said excitedly, "It's between the middle and the back, not conspicuous, and out of Brother Xiu Yan's sight."

Su Wenqing looked at the big rock on the Xiqian Creek with doubt in her eyes. However, there was a saying that goes, "If you don't listen to the advice of your predecessors, you will suffer the consequences." Su Zhining was obviously a veteran, so Su Wenqing decided to trust her this time.

Su Wenqing crouched and trembled for more than an hour. When she saw that the drinking game was about to end, she was about to blow rainbow farts to Su Zhining who had just saved her life, when she saw a peach blossom lantern stumbling down the river from upstream and crashing into the embrace of the large rock in front of her.

Su Wenqing turned her head to look at Su Zhining with shock on her face and happened to catch Su Zhining trying to move her futon and table to the side without any expression.

Su Zhining smiled awkwardly, "Third Sister is proficient in music, chess, calligraphy and painting. This little thing should not be difficult for her."

Su Wenqing wanted to cry but had no tears. What did she mean by proficient in everything? She knew nothing about those things!!

The drums sounded upstream, and Su Wenqing burst into tears, "Second Sister!!"

Su Zhining stood up hurriedly, "Don't worry, don't worry, I will help you get the lantern up."

Su Wenqing: ...Sisters are birds of different forests. It is normal for them to fly away separately when disaster strikes. She should not despair because of human nature.

Su Wenqing drank the wine in the cup with tears in her eyes as the drum beat more and more urgently. She turned over the cup and saw two lines of small seal characters engraved on the bottom: "Express the spring with a painting, express sorrow with a poem".

Su Wenqing: ...Chinese characters are so wonderful. Why can she recognize these characters when they are separated, but cannot understand them when they are put together???

Su Zhining stretched her head and breathed a sigh of relief after seeing the topic. "It’s okay. Poetry and painting are both your forte. I saw that the painting 'Linjiang Xiantu' you painted last month was very good. Why don't you paint that?"

Su Wenqing wanted to cry. What was she good at? She didn’t even know what “Linjiang Xiantu” was!!! This was the first time since she transmigrated here that she wished she could not control her body!!

Two maids in pink skirts removed the tea from the table in front of Su Wenqing, placed the ink, paper and inkstone in place, and finally, with a smile and a respectful hand posture, they put the brush into Su Wenqing's hands.

Su Wenqing cried, isn't this forcing people to do something???

"Don't worry, don't worry," Su Zhining said, "Why don't you write a poem first? You have always been very talented in writing, so just casually write a few lines of poetry first!"

Casually?? That's a skill only you ancient people have. I’m a modern person. I can only casually solve two linear equations of two variables... and that's only before the college entrance examination.

"Don't be shy, Sister Su. I've heard that you are very talented. All the others have shown their mediocre talents, you must let us see what the true talent looks like." Several young men around thirteen or fourteen years old on the other side of the river started to make a noise.

"Oh, don't tell me that your talent is all exaggerated and is actually just for show." Where there is encouragement there is also ridicule, and many people began to whisper.

"Hurry up," Su Zhining urged, "Look at what these people are saying. Don't be shy."

Although Su Wenqing also wanted to paint a picture of "A Thousand Li of Rivers and Mountains" like the heroine in novels and TV dramas, and slap the faces of those who made sarcastic remarks, the problem was that she couldn't do it!!!

"Can I just give up?"

Su Wenqing decided that she would stay at home until the day she died from then on.

"Give up?" Su Zhining objected fiercely, "No! If you give up, the Su family will lose face! How can I face Brother Xiuyan in the future?!"

Su Wenqing was forced by Su Zhining. She tried hard to recall how to draw peonies in her Chinese painting class. She gritted her teeth and casually drew two or three pale pink peonies that were half overlapped on the rice paper.

Su Zhining said, "Oh my god! Is this a new painting method that you came up with? It's so beautiful."

When the others saw this, they all exclaimed and asked Su Zhining to pass it around. Su Zhining put her hands on her hips and interrupted, "She hasn't written the poem yet, why are you all so excited?"

Su Wenqing turned her neck stiffly and looked at Su Zhining, "I still have to write a poem?"

Su Zhining pointed at the small seal characters on the wine cup, "'Express spring with a painting, and express sorrow with a poem'. If I understand it correctly, this sorrow should also be related to spring."

Su Wenqing hesitated to write until the ink was about to drip onto the rice paper before she reacted. After all, this was a historical fiction novel. They didn't even have Tao Yuanming in this world. Did that mean she could use any of the 300 Tang poems at will?

She looked at the peach blossoms all over the mountain and suddenly an idea came to her mind. She picked up the brush and wrote, "In late spring all the blooming flowers wilt, but the peach blossoms in this hill have just appeared..."

*It’s a famous poem by Bai Juyi

Su Zhining tugged at Su Wenqing's sleeve, "No, no, it's spring melancholy, and you should create a poem, not writing according to memory!"

Su Wenqing: ...No, why do you have Bai Juyi but not Tao Yuanming??? Do you discriminate against Tianyuan literature style???

However, Su Wenqing herself was in danger now, and she could not spare the energy to care about the life and death of the Tianyuan literature style. She blacked out the two lines, used her trick of writing essays for the college entrance examination, and racked her brains...

In the Peach Blossom Spring, the east wind blew softly, and people admired the peach blossoms unwarily...

Hmm... the fragrant dew spring and white cold rouge, talk about romance when drinking happily...

*T/N: Sorry, I really don’t understand these two lines, can anyone help?

The original text is: 桃花源里东风软，人倚桃花空绸缪......

嗯......香泉露白胭脂冷，酒酣醉醒说风流......

Before Su Wenqing had any time to examine her poor handwriting, the rice paper was passed away.

"Not bad, not bad. You can depict the graceful appearance of the peony with just a few strokes. Very wonderful!"

"Yes, yes! And this way of painting is unprecedented. Could it be that Third Miss Su created it herself?"

Su Wenqing, who was mentioned, laughed awkwardly a few times and bowed to Qi Baishi again and again in her heart. Saving a life is better than building a seven-story pagoda. Grandpa Baishi, please don't blame me!

*Qi Baishi was a famous Chinese painter

"That... um..."

"You have the nerve to describe someone as both talented and beautiful with this kind of writing, huh." Wang Ruoyan didn't even look at it, but passed it away with a look of disgust on her face.

“Although the calligraphy needs to be improved, the unique painting style alone is enough to prove the talent.” Wang Xiuyan shook his head and smiled.

Xiao Yun, who was sitting nearby, took the painting and spat out a mouthful of wine after looking at it. People around him cast puzzled looks at him.

Wang Ruoyan said, "Your Highness the Fifth Prince also feels that this is too horrible to look at, right? A three-year-old child's scribbles would probably be better than this."

Xiao Yun smiled lightly, handed the painting to Xie Shian, and explained: "Miss Wang misunderstood, I was just amazed by this painting method."

Wang Ruoyan secretly glanced at Xie Shian and snorted coldly with a bad expression.

After Xiao Yun saw that everyone around them had turned their attention away from them, he hooked his arm around Xie Shian's shoulder and moved closer.

Xie Shian glanced at the wine stain on Xiao Yun's sleeve with disdain.

"This Third Miss Su is truly amazing... Do you know where this poem of hers came from?"

Xie Shian didn't realize that it had any source. Hearing that, he became a little interested, "Hmm?"

Xiao Yun whispered slyly, "There is a storybook circulating widely on the black market recently, called 'The Regent and the Empress Dowager'."

Xie Shian: "The Regent...and the Empress Dowager?"

Seeing Xie Shian's confused expression, Xiao Yun added: "It’s about the romantic affair between the former Regent and the Empress Dowager. It is a new work by Mr. Partridge, and the poem Third Miss Su just wrote quoted a line from the book - 'The pear blossoms on the branches are empty, deep affection and romantic affair.'"

*T/N: Sorry, I really don’t understand this poem, can anyone help?

The original is: 梨花枝头空绸缪，深情缱绻说风流

Xie Shian coughed up the wine in his mouth when he heard this. He asked uncertainly, "Who are you talking about? Mr. Partridge?"

Xiao Yun said, "Yes, it’s the Mr. Partridge who specializes in writing banned books. Why? Do you know him?"

"No," Xie Shian retracted his indescribable expression and denied it without hesitation, "I don't know him."

 

The author has something to say:

Xie Shian: I am very panicked. What should I do if I have a mother at home who loves to write pornographic books?

Author: Don't panic, in the future, you will have a wife who loves to read pornographic books.

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